Yesha Callahan

When Kiosks Attack

“Wow, you hair is so curly, may I straighten it?”, asks the guy with the dirty flat iron that’s been used on about 50 women.

“Ma’am, can I take a look at your nails for just one sec?”, asks the guy with the nail buffer and hand cream that’s supposed to work wonders.

“Hey, how about a new cell phone?”, asks the teenager who doesn’t look old enough to work to begin with, as he stands behind the cell phone booth.

“Mademoiselle, tu parle francais? Would you like to learn a 2nd language?”, asks the kid who sounds as if he practiced that small piece of French for the past few hours.

I’m sure I’m not the only person who’s had these same experiences at their local mall. The kiosk sales people are the ones I try to avoid like the plague. They are some of the most aggressive people I’ve come across during my shopping experiences. As I approach them, nowadays, I make sure NOT to make any eye contact, and walk as far away from their kiosk as I possibly can.

I fell prey to the “Can I Straighten Your Hair” kiosk man once. I had my normal curly-do going on and he did a sneak attack. Practically jumped from behind the kiosk and asked me to sit down.  I think the only reason I did sit, was because he was quite handsome. I didn’t even bother to ask if the flat iron was clean. He looked that good. As he was combing through my hair to part it into sections, I was melting in my seat (I love when a man plays in my hair). After he straightened a few sections, he gave me the big ‘sale’ talk. I don’t know how many times I said no, but eventually I walked away with something that looked like an ’80’s duck-tail flowing down my back and an expensive ass flat-iron, which till this day I still use.

So you’d think after that first experience, I would be a little more alert when it comes to preventing any interaction with the kiosk sales people. Well, I thought the same thing too, until I came across the “hand cream & nail buffer that works magic” man. Once again, it was his looks that got me. He grabbed my hand, and pulled me towards his booth. He then started to massage my hand, and it actually didn’t feel too bad.  He pulled out his magic buffer and buffed my nails. I had to agree that they looked a lot better, and didn’t even need a clear coat of acrylic. Forty-five dollars later, I had two sets of hand cream and two nail buffers.

I’m starting to realize the ploy of the kiosks. Get some handsome man to work kiosk, and lure the women to them with their accents and their looks. Instant sale! It may have happened twice, but it won’t happen a third time. I refuse to be lured into the kiosk matrix, anymore! That’s my word and I’m sticking to it, well, unless I can get my hands on a good Rosetta Stone deal!

  1. November 18, 2008 - Reply

    You’ve been hoodwinked…bamboozled…led astray! LMAO WOW…woman! You have NO defenses around a fine man! I gotta teach you how to be steely cold! (Um, if you’re looking to unload that extra set of nail stuff…you know my addy) LMAO
    Oh, and BROOKLYN? Stop lying…the moment some gorgeous dude starts trying to sell you a pocket datebook with the Kung Fu grip, you’re gonna be back here blogging. HA!

    • November 19, 2008 - Reply


      Nope, ain’t happening! I’m done messing with those kiosk folks!

  2. November 18, 2008 - Reply

    Girl, that’s hilarious! I think you’ve identified a great marketing ploy for the flat iron companies…have a hunk offer to show women how wonderful the iron is and run his fingers through hair while whispering that the iron may require a credit check…hee hee.
    Don’t feel bad. My friend ordered the Kiyoseki iron after watching the infomercial. $100+ later…she loves hers and I bought one for $79…a flat iron? Oy!
    P.S. Thanks for the tag. I had fun reminiscing :).

    • November 19, 2008 - Reply


      See, now I’m going to find out what this Kiyoseki iron is all about..I love a good flat iron!

  3. November 19, 2008 - Reply

    LOL! I was got by the guy withthe sea salt scrub stuff. Making my hands all soft and stuff.
    I think a high end flat iron is the best investment ever! My BFF bought one from Visible Changes that is the TRUTH I tell you. It was 129 I think. However I learned the best thing for hair is to invest in pro tools. A good blow dryer and flat iron make the difference when doing your hair at home.

    • November 20, 2008 - Reply


      Now i’m going to have to look into that flat iron too! Its about time I got a new one.

  4. November 20, 2008 - Reply

    Kiosks are the #1 reason I avoid malls… but i can see how one could fall for a handsome man offering to do their hair or nails.

    • November 20, 2008 - Reply


      What’s even worst is that I live right across the street from a mall…holidays are HELL! I think they had extra kiosks during this time of the year.

  5. November 20, 2008 - Reply

    Where can I find these handsomely aggressive men? I never get accosted {whine!}. The kiosk mall people I see are very sloth like, slumped on their stools, with their eyes half-closed. They just can’t be bothered. Must be the sleepy California sunshine.

    • November 20, 2008 - Reply

      @Margaret (Nanny Goats)

      Well be grateful for that California sunshine, it looks like I’ll be enjoying some Maryland snow soon 🙂

  6. November 21, 2008 - Reply

    they sound like panhandlers lol

  7. November 24, 2008 - Reply

    Hey Brooklyn,
    You’ve been tagged!
    Read my blog!

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