Somewhere on Rt. 29 North in Burtonsville, MD there is a hamster that has either:
A) Lost its way in the bushes
B) Has become roadkill
C) Has become a larger animal’s dinner.
For the past couple of months, ever since he saw his cousin’s hamster, my son has been begging me to get him one. Every couple of days, he’d bring up the hamster issue, and I would flat out say NO. I did not want any type of rodent in my house. Dogs, sure. Rodents, never.
This past weekend, he was in the NJ area visiting family and my grandmother promised that she would take him to the pet store to buy a hamster. I knew I should have stuck to saying ‘no’, but I decided that I would allow her to buy him one. For whatever reason, I was informed on Sunday, that she didn’t have time to take him to the store, so she suggested that I look on Craigslist for one.
When the kid came back home, all he could talk about was this damn hamster. What he was going to name it. Where he was going to put the cage. This went on & on & on. I finally had to tell him to cut it out with the hamster talk. Eventually I decided to look on Craigslist, to see if anyone was giving away a hamster, because I seriously did not want to spend money on a rodent. It didn’t take long to find someone who was giving away a hamster. I emailed the woman and we chose a time for me to pick it up, which was today.
Today was the ‘big’ day. The kid was finally going to get his hamster. He was excited, and I would have rather had a V-8. We made our way to the meeting place in Rockville, made the hamster transaction, and were on our way back home.
About 15 minutes into the ride. There were screams & panic in the back of my truck, the kid and my nephew were scrambling for cover. Some how the damn rodent got out of the cage and was running around on the floor!! Here I am driving down Rt. 29 at night, and in the rain, and panic is erupting in the back seat. I swerved to pull over onto the shoulder, so I could see what was going on. What a fucking great time to find out that my son and nephew were both AFRAID to pick up the damn rodent. We were parked on the shoulder for about a 1/2 hour, in between me yelling at them, the damn hamster running from the back of the truck to the front seat area, I had reached my breaking point!
Why me??? Why me? ((C) Nancy Kerrigan) Is what I was yelling!
I ordered them to get the fucking hamster up the best way they could and pitch the shit out of my car. YES, I told them to throw it out of the car! At this point, I was FUMING. Finally, I managed to flip it out of my door with tip of my boot. Be gone you nasty rodent! Arrivederci!
The ride back to the house was a very somber one. I heard sniffling in the back seat. My son and nephew were both in tears. But they caused it for themselves. All they had to do was manage to keep the hamster in it’s cage for the amount of time it took to get home. But noooooooo. That didn’t happen. So, now the kid has a hamster cage as a pet.