Yesha Callahan

Dance Like No One’s Watching

….that’s if you have rhythm.


I joke. I kid. Well, not really. You see tonight  I decided to head out with a friend to my town’s local pool hall/lounge/sports bar/club. Surprisingly the place had a pretty good mix of music. I hadn’t planned on staying too long because it’s  the middle of the work week. So I grabbed a drink and stood back to observe for a few. My friend headed to the dance floor really quick. He told me that he had his eyes on some chick and wanted to get her attention. Even though she was already dancing with some other guy, he made his way over to her.

To give you a bit of background info on my friend. Him and I rarely go out together unless I’m trying to hook him up with a girlfriend of mine and it’s a double date type of deal. I’ve never gone out with him to any type of function/event that involves dancing or any other type of activity that involves having, um, how can I put this…


When he got on the dance floor, he looked as if he was having seizures. I practically choked on my drink while watching him. The girl he was trying to dance with stopped right in the middle of the song and walked away and left him standing there. Eventually after more spastic movements he made his way back to the bar area.

“I guess she couldn’t handle all of that”, he said.

“All of what? I think she thought you were having seizures”, I laughed.

I asked him what happened to the rhythm? Was he listening to the same song everyone else was, or did he have something totally different in his head? I didn’t know whether to feel bad for his lack of rhythm or to feel bad because he has no idea he doesn’t have any at all. I thought to myself for a second. Wait. This man went to an HBCU (Historically Black College/University), was in one of the best HBCU marching bands there ever was! WTF happened?

Before I could even ask him how he managed to be in a marching band without any rhythm, he moved on to his next victim on the dance floor. Once again, the sporadic movement, the arms wailing in the air, his periodic pelvic thrusts was way to much for the woman to handle. But instead of walking away from him, she grabbed his hand and lead him to the bar.  They talked for a few minutes and eventually exchanged phone numbers before she headed out the door. Thankfully, he’s quite a handsome and polite man, because it definitely wasn’t his dancing moves the reeled her in.

As I’m laying here tonight, I’m praying that my son will eventually get his rhythm in tune. I try not to laugh when he attempts to dance, but now looking back at my friend on the dance floor, I’m definitely going to have to put in some work with my son, just so he won’t end up like Mr. Rhythm-less Nation.

  1. September 4, 2008 - Reply

    My brother is the same way. I still haven’t figured out how he was able to march in a HBCU band, when he has absolutely NO moves!

  2. September 4, 2008 - Reply

    I guess it’s the fact that they can count, and stay on beat that

  3. September 4, 2008 - Reply

    Oh! I can’t take it! Lol! My poor boys can’t dance to save anyones life but are quite handy with instruments… go figure!

    • September 6, 2008 - Reply


      See, I think it has to do with the measurement of music notes, as to why some people are musically inclined and not rhythmically inclined.

  4. September 4, 2008 - Reply

    Ok, so I was reading this and was hoping to say something in this comment to the effect of…
    “Thats what you get when you hangout with white boys.”
    But then I read that dude was black, and I lost it. And the negro was in the marching band too??

    • September 6, 2008 - Reply


      You do realize, some white people have rhythm..look at Justin Timberlake..LOL!

  5. September 4, 2008 - Reply

    We use to call that getting clowned on te dance floor. Girl do you know he just clowned me on the dance floor. *lol*

    • September 6, 2008 - Reply


      LOL!! I remember that saying!

  6. September 4, 2008 - Reply

    Haha………. I can’t really dance, not REALLY. I do okay when I’m wasted and shit but I can’t REALLY dance. LoL. It’s cool though because when you’re like the only black girl in a sea of white people, everyone thinks you’re GROOVIN. LoL.

    • September 6, 2008 - Reply

      @Lisa M. Turtle BEEZIES

      See, those Anne Arundel County white girls, only know Britney Spears as being a good dancer, you break out on move contrary to that, and you might as well be Ciara!

      • September 6, 2008 - Reply

        @[fung'ke] [blak] [chik]

        You ain’t never lied. When I was at college in ATL though people were like… “You do aiight.” LMAO.

  7. September 4, 2008 - Reply

    Where do you find these friends????? LMAO

    • September 6, 2008 - Reply

      @Yashieka - The Big Foot Chica

      Hmmm..yeah, I asked myself that about you too! LOL!

  8. September 6, 2008 - Reply

    Can YO ass dance? Is that possible that the kid got it from YOU? I seentcho grandma on the pole. Yo whole CLAN is rhythmless! LMAO
    I kid, I kid…I joke…LOL

    • September 6, 2008 - Reply


      My whole clan is not rhythmless..only those who lack melanin! LOL! Hence, my grandmother’s dancing…lol!

  9. September 8, 2008 - Reply


  10. September 12, 2008 - Reply

    awww. yo gabba gabba is what’s up! “can we dance (yeaaaaa) well, let’s do it….a-break it dowwwnnn” my name is anissa – i like to dance. lol.

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