Yesha Callahan

Just Say No To Moldy Men

To the left, is a picture of molded bread. Molding is a natural process for bread once it’s been sitting around after about two weeks. Eventually it starts to get that moldy smell, and soon the spores sprout and mold forms. It not only happens to bread, but just about anything if you let it sit around long enough.

Even Men*.

Have you ever met a man that you weren’t immediately attracted to? You hang out a few times, but you still can’t say that he’s someone you can see yourself involved with? Even though he seems to have everything going for him, there’s just something that isn’t giving you that immediate feeling of attraction. It could be either his looks, something about his personality, maybe his head is too big for his neck, or he’s just an inch shorter than what you’re used to? But instead of severing ties with this person, because there’s no need in stringing him along, you allow him to ‘grow’ on you like mold.

There have been several times in the span of my dating career (yeah, I call it a career b/c it’s hard ass work sometimes) where that initial attraction wasn’t there, but I said to myself, “Maybe, I’ll just see what happens”. Now, not to sound superficial, but the initial attraction to me is always purely physical. So needless to say, my moldly men have included men who instead of having a six pack, may have had a keg, instead of having smooth perfect skin, may have had a few razor bumps, instead of having a perfect set of teeth, usually had either a set that could have belonged to the clown from Stephen King’s “IT” movie, or something with a gap as big as the Suez Canal, like Michael Strahan.

If only these men realized from the get-go, that I was making concessions for them, because of something that I may have saw in their personality. Maybe I should have shown them photos of my past boyfriends, which included the ‘model’ types, because maybe, just maybe if I did, then their egos would have not superceeded their aesthetically challenged looks.

I was talking to a cousin of mine the other day, and we realized that all of the “Moldy Men” we have dated, whether it took their looks to grow on us or their personality, it backfired in the worst ways! Some of these men turned out to be some of the biggest assholes ever. I half seriously and half jokingly told her that I refuse to get suck in by someone who I think could grow on me. For now on, if there isnt’ that immediate attraction, be it physical or mental, I’m not going to let them mold on me, but fold them away like an old outfit that I never plan on wearing again. Because in the long run, I think I’d rather go about my life knowing that if I happened to break up with someone or vice versa, it was someone who there was that immediate ‘click’ with, not with someone that I had to make concessions for.

*this was not a post about relationships..lol!
  1. September 28, 2009 - Reply

    Where do you come up with these titles???
    Just a long time lurker, passing through & I loved this post!

  2. September 28, 2009 - Reply

    I giggle because of the conversations that have stemmed from this damn topic. Well put my friend, well put!

  3. September 28, 2009 - Reply

    If this isnt the damn truth! Keep this kind of ish coming! You must have read my mind!

  4. September 29, 2009 - Reply

    Ohhh those many convos! If the walls could talk..lol

  5. September 29, 2009 - Reply

    It seems to be heavily on a lot of my gf's minds recently!

  6. September 29, 2009 - Reply

    wow, she must be a great woman! lol

  7. September 29, 2009 - Reply

    Thanks for de-lurking yourself!
    you should make a habit of it 🙂

  8. September 29, 2009 - Reply

    I love it! How often do we tell ourselves, “yeah he'll come around…” or “yeah he has slight halitosis but he shoo is funny!” LOL I like this post because it is like mold growing on is, turning what is good and fresh old and stale… almost parasitic sucking the life out of us by wasting our time and being mere distractions from the supple fruit of the men who are really worth getting to know.

  9. September 29, 2009 - Reply

    You're starting to sound like my wife.

  10. September 29, 2009 - Reply

    Yea, you ain't never lied. I remember past situations where I thought…ok, so he's not Rich Pryor funny…just D.L. Hughley funny. Or he cant kiss but he can…well, he's aight. LMAO Girl, I'm just gone go ahead and tell you…I'm allergic to mold/spores/penicillin.

    we >>>here<<<

  11. September 29, 2009 - Reply

    Hell, whatever molding that a man or woman ain't get into their rearing days of Childhood, they will NOT get it in adult life unless it's by an act of GOD. I REFUSE to Mold or shape ANYBODY. If they ain't what I want when I first meet em' or hang out with em', SORRY!!

    I guess that's why I'm single and HAVE been for so long.

  12. September 30, 2009 - Reply

    Oh if I had a dollar for every raggedy bit of raw clay man I tried to sculpt, mold, and glaze into something suitable… I would be typing this from my private island in the Carib. No more concessions, I gotta like what I see, hear (taste, smell?) from jump or I'm moving on.

  13. September 30, 2009 - Reply

    Oh if I had a dollar for every raggedy bit of raw clay man I tried to sculpt, mold, and glaze into something suitable… I would be typing this from my private island in the Carib. No more concessions, I gotta like what I see, hear (taste, smell?) from jump or I'm moving on.

  14. October 12, 2009 - Reply

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